Esco
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- May 4, 2021
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Why would you ask me to press 1 for English and then immediately put someone from India on the phone!
Joke of the day! (No Memes)
- Thread starter Grease Monkey
- Start date
Stinky
Active member
- May 9, 2021
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I thought that was how you kept an idiot in suspense
dbart
Well-known member
- May 5, 2021
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, Yep that's the joke...forgot to post it the next day! Hahaha we're you waiting?? Lol
Stinky
Active member
- May 9, 2021
- 546
- 215
Waiting for what?
I don't remember?
LOL
I don't remember?
LOL
Esco
Well-known member
- May 4, 2021
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what to you get if you cross a detective and aligator?>
an investi-GATOR
an investi-GATOR
Esco
Well-known member
- May 4, 2021
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Whoever came up with the word "dentures" really missed the opportunity to call them "substitooths"
Esco
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- May 4, 2021
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CNN lecturing Americans on patriotism is like Alec Baldwin teaching gun safety.
John@Outfront
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- Apr 30, 2021
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The word "queue" is ironic. It's just a Q with a bunch of silent letters waiting in line.
JDMeister
Forum Moderator
- May 1, 2021
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Stevie Wonder and Tiger Woods are in a bar talking about golf and singing.
Woods turns to Wonder and says, “How is the singing career going?”
Stevie Wonder replies, “Not too bad! How’s the golf?”
Woods replies: “Not too bad, I’ve had some problems with my swing, but I think I’ve got that right now.”
Stevie says, “I always find that when my swing goes wrong, I need to stop playing for a while and not think about it. Then, the next time I play, it seems to be all right.”
Tiger asks, “You play golf?”
Wonder replies, “Oh yeah, I’ve been playing for years.”
And Woods says, “But you’re blind. How can you play golf if you’re blind?”
Wonder replies, “I get my caddy to stand in the middle of the fairway and call to me. I listen for the sound of his voice and play the ball towards him. Then, when I get to where the ball lands, the caddy moves to the green or farther down the fairway and again I play the ball towards his voice.”
“But how do you putt?” asks Woods.
“Well,” Stevie says, “I get my caddy to lean down in front of the hole and call to me with his head on the ground and I just play the ball towards his voice.”
Woods asks, “What’s your handicap?”
Stevie says, “Well, I’m a scratch golfer.”
Woods, incredulous, says to Stevie: “We’ve got to play a round sometime.”
Wonder replies, “Well, people don’t take me seriously, so I only play for money, and never play for less than $10,000 a hole.”
Woods thinks about it and says, “OK, I’m game for that, when would you like to play?”
Stevie says, “Pick a night!”
Woods turns to Wonder and says, “How is the singing career going?”
Stevie Wonder replies, “Not too bad! How’s the golf?”
Woods replies: “Not too bad, I’ve had some problems with my swing, but I think I’ve got that right now.”
Stevie says, “I always find that when my swing goes wrong, I need to stop playing for a while and not think about it. Then, the next time I play, it seems to be all right.”
Tiger asks, “You play golf?”
Wonder replies, “Oh yeah, I’ve been playing for years.”
And Woods says, “But you’re blind. How can you play golf if you’re blind?”
Wonder replies, “I get my caddy to stand in the middle of the fairway and call to me. I listen for the sound of his voice and play the ball towards him. Then, when I get to where the ball lands, the caddy moves to the green or farther down the fairway and again I play the ball towards his voice.”
“But how do you putt?” asks Woods.
“Well,” Stevie says, “I get my caddy to lean down in front of the hole and call to me with his head on the ground and I just play the ball towards his voice.”
Woods asks, “What’s your handicap?”
Stevie says, “Well, I’m a scratch golfer.”
Woods, incredulous, says to Stevie: “We’ve got to play a round sometime.”
Wonder replies, “Well, people don’t take me seriously, so I only play for money, and never play for less than $10,000 a hole.”
Woods thinks about it and says, “OK, I’m game for that, when would you like to play?”
Stevie says, “Pick a night!”
Esco
Well-known member
- May 4, 2021
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dont worry, if you heard the shot you were not the target
Esco
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- May 4, 2021
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Sometimes I read a text and think, what a psycho. Then I press send
Esco
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- May 4, 2021
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Egg prices are dropping. Turns out, if you stop killing chickens, they lay more eggs.
