"I’m gonna piss money down a hole"
^^This is the part of your post I was referring to. So, if you want to piss money down a hole, I'm volunteering to be the hole.
This ^^
Just get some different wheels that don't make you look like a Detroit baller and it'll look like a whole different truck.
Then find out when the next space launch is and show up asking if they got room for those things in one of them outer space dumpsters. Once they see em they'll...
I think it's a good deterrent but if they managed to either get the ball connected or just pull with a chain they could just break the leg off the jack or bend it enough so that it's no longer a problem.