Joke of the day! (No Memes)

My goal is to be the old person that everybody is afraid to take out in public
 
I recently spent $6500 on this registered Black Angus bull. I put him out with the herd but he just ate grass and wouldn't even look at a cow. I was beginning to think I had paid more for that bull than he was worth. Anyway......I had the Vet come and take a look at him. He said,, the bull was very healthy, but possibly just a little young.
So he gave me some pills to feed him once per day. The bull started to service the cows within two days……. all my cows! He even broke through the fence and bred with all of my neighbor's cows! He's like a machine! I don't know what was in the pills the Vet gave him ...
but they kind of taste like peppermint
 
Have you ever played Quiet Tennis?
It's like regular tennis but without the racket!
 
What looks like half a tree?

The other half!

Ok, I'm done with my bad dad jokes for the day!
LOL
 
If anyone gets a message from me about canned meat, don't open it. It's Spam.
 
Condoms don't always guarantee safe sex. A buddy of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman's husband.
 
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