Why did you go that way?
You should have went down the 5, to the 138... headed into Palmdale. Hit the 14 south ... back on the 138 (Pearblossom Highway) and then to the 15. Would have dropped you very close to Rialto without any of that 210 BS. This is what I do when coming back from Yosemite during the middle of the day. You don't see 3/4 of the shit you complain about... but do get to experience Palmdale.
Second... you're in one of the most populated areas of So Cal at that point... roads are going to be fucked. Same as Dallas, Same as Houston, same as Phoenix, Denver and even SLC. Population densities create this issue, it's not just So Cal.
To answer the other question... there are a lot of good jobs here (San Diego) and it's really not as bad as you're outlining.
Six figure salary, 5 minutes from work with zero mortgage or rent payment and property taxes under 2k annually... hard to leave. Why would I?